YOUR phone, YOUR Facebook, YOUR life-what gives your parents the right to go check on these things? If you have a parent/guardian who is constantly asking to see your texts, bugging you about who you talk to online, and asking you what is happening in your life-then you are really really lucky. Thats right, lucky. This means that your parents care enough about you and your well-being to make sure that things are okay with you. And chances are, something isn’t going all that right if your parents are asking about your phone and Facebook. We have all encountered times in our lives when we get ourselves in trouble with our phones or something we posted online. And, guess what-your parents can tell. They have known you for so long that the slightest change in you is huge to them. It’s their job as parents to watch over, care for, and nurture you. They check on you because they love you and want you to be safe. If it becomes an issue that does not go away on its own(which it wont) you need to talk to your parents about how it can be fixed. The key here is going to be compromise. If your parents want to see what you do on Facebook ask that they make their own and “friend” you. This can open a new door of communication. As far as checking your cell phone, parents pay the bill. You need to show your parents that you can be trusted with a cell phone and the responsibility that comes with it. If that means showing them your pictures or texts-you gotta do what you gotta do.
So remember, your parents love you. They care about you immensely, and want the best for you. So give them a break the next time they check on you. You are luckier than you realize.
-Kate MacHugh, Intern for Driven
“Did you hear about Brianna?” “Well I heard that Rob….” “I cant believe that Megan did….”
We all get ourselves into drama at one time or another.Avoiding drama can be difficult when gossip and being petty is so prevalent. We walk into church and our friends tell us about something juicy that happened at the youth group we missed or we let a friend’s secret unintentionally slip at the lunch table. We should aim to stay out of drama but it can be really hard!
Lets say that you have gotten yourself into drama-yours, someone else’s, everyones.How do you get out alive and with the friends you went in with? First take a deep breath. Whatever it is, is not the end of the world. No matter how big it may seem, it can be fixed if you do the work.
1. Confront the gossiper
If YOU are the one gossiping – Apologize to the person you gossiped about. Tell them you understand how it could have hurt them and make a sincere promise to not let it happen again.
If someone is gossiping about you or a friend – Let them know that you do not appreciate their behavior and no else does either. Being confronted with the fact that people are uninterested will squash the rumor mill.
2. When you hear the rumor again
Tell the rumor whisperer that you are uninterested in hearing it, and if you can dispel the rumor.
3. Don’t Spread Rumors
Rumors are 100% preventable. Rumors are like fire. Fire needs oxygen to survive and rumors need a mouth to tell them and ear to listen.
Granted, if you did put your foot in your mouth and say something about a friend it is going to take some time for them to trust you again. Be understanding of their needs, and work to repair your friendship as best you can.
-Kate MacHugh, Intern For Driven
“Facebook me.” How many times a day do you hear that? I am going to guess a lot. It seems lately that everyone is on Facebook-parents, relatives, teachers, pastors. Is your online persona, the person you want those important people in your life to view you as? If not, then you need to take a good hard look at what you are putting on Facebook for the world to see. Once it is on Facebook it becomes public knowledge. It may seem far off in the future, but employers and colleges are going to look at your Facebook. However, Facebook can be a wonderful way to express yourself and keep in touch. So next time you think about posting a status or a picture, think to yourself-“Would my parent/pastor/future employer want to see this?” If not, its probably a smart idea to save that story for your friends, not the entire world.
~Kate MacHugh, Intern for Driven